Reflections

This was the only video I had here. Someone sent it in an email. We recently went camping and the next day everyone brought their guns and we went shooting. This is me shooting my SKS and no… we aint in no malitia *spit* *ding* (said in my best southern accent)

So I have been thinking about does passionate worship have to be loud worship.

Funny how I wrote that last night, then this morning I went to the staff meeting… well, I missed the staff meeting and went to the prayer meeting. We have two meetings every Tuesday. The staff meeting which is followed by a time when the pastoral team comes together for prayer. Actually the pastors pray together every day. Except me, I can only make Tuesdays.

Maybe I should back up just a second. I am the college pastor at Harvest Cathedral. BUT I am also the Systems Administrator for another company. Some people say I’m a part-time pastor. But if you’ve ever been a “part-time” pastor. Well, you know, there just aint such a thing.

You know that sermon where the pastor tells you everything you have belongs to God and you are just a steward? Well I honestly believe that! So to me, I’m getting paid out of Gods money, irregardless of if it comes through the churches bank account or my other jobs bank account. That being said, I’m a pastor, I just have some other responsibilities on top of it. One of those is… well… actually being at work. So its a bit hard to make the daily prayer time. So on Tuesdays I take my “lunch” at 8:45am. That way I can catch the end of the staff meeting and the beginning of the prayer time.

There is so much exciting stuff happening at my church. We are so right on the edge of this amazing God thing. One of those is a new sound. Tuning into the sound of praise in heaven and joining in with it here on earth. So here’s the thing I found interesting. This morning my pastor is talking about praying and worshiping and says “It’s not about being loud, its about giving 100%” That says it all to me.

It seems when I’m in a group of thousands, its easy to open up and just praise God. When I’m alone, its easy to open up and just praise God. But get in a group of 10 or 20… why does it feel difficult?

Back to the whole does passionate praise have to be loud. I think there are times for loud praise and times for quite praise. I believe we can sit in a group of 2000 and without saying a word, praise God. But I also believe there is something special about opening your mouth and verbally praising God. I think it releases something. It somehow comes out in the physical but begins to change the spiritual atmosphere around you. More so than a prayer spoken in your mind.

Sometimes sitting in a meeting its like we urge people to open up their mouths and praise God. Its like we try to push them not lead them into a state of worship. But why don’t we praise out loud? Well what will my friends think? What if I don’t sound as “goodâ€? as the guy next to me? And sometimes I get thoughts of not wanting to be the pharisee on the corner drawing attention to himself. So I sing a bit lower, I pray a bit quieter. So as I look at it… and ponder it… its not about being loud. Its about being 100%.

If your 100% is quiet or if your 100% is singing praise loudly and boldly then its all good. But if you are thinking about the guy next to you or the dishes in the sink, or whats for lunch after the service, or what if this, or what if that…. then its not 100% even if your screaming praises to the top of your lungs.

As I look back and evaluate myself, I think I am typically in the 80% range allowing myself to slip in 100% maybe 40% of the time. Why? I don’t know. Lots of reasons, I could list em but this is already getting long and I don’t want yall totally bored. All I know is, I want to be a 100% worshiper.

Just a few things I have been pondering lately:

1) How busy is too busy? to prune or not to prune…
2) Does passionate worship have to be loud worship?

3) What side of the but are you on?

I’ve seen this one before but saw it again over at Randy’s blog

and thought I would see what it says about me.

You know, there are so many great blogs out there that I love to read. Blogs that feed the fire inside me. But I have been crazy busy and haven’t had time to read anything, much less write anything. So finally an update…

Kinda funny how just after God shows me this thing about fires and fuel and how the enemy works to put out this fire… You know, by starting fires around you to burn up the fuel… and then I just seem to forget it all. The past couple weeks have been crazy. It seems every time I get ready to go to the staff meeting at church, something else comes up and I can’t make it. I use to go to breakfast once a week with a great friend. Just to talk about whats going on in our lives and to pray for each other. We’ve been doing that for 3 or 4 years now and suddenly our schedules have made it harder so we just don’t meet anymore. I once spent the first 30 minutes of the day reading my bible while my son was in the shower… for some reason, not sure why, I haven’t been doing that. The 25 minute drive to the office… was my prayer time. Time to pray for the students involved in our college ministry. Time to pray for other people that God placed on my heart. But for some reason, not sure why, I haven’t done that in a couple weeks either. I’ve allowed myself to be pulled in so many directions that I haven’t been able to focus on any one. So I just sort of let go and allowed myself to be tossed from fire to fire trying to manage all the stuff and so now I find myself just tired. Just a bit dazed and wondering what in the world is going on.

So I’m driving home and ask myself… “Whats THAT all about?� well… HELLO McFly… remember what you wrote on your blog a couple weeks ago??? Well duh, THATS whats been going on.

Don’t you love it when God not only reveals some truth to you but lets you live it, even when it sucks to do it?

So I’ve realized… stop allowing all the fuel around you to be burnt up and throw some more gas on the REAL fire!!!